The South has Risen (and finally reached paleolithic)

Click on over and check out Paris Hilton's hamburger ad that has a ton of old religious people steamed.

Good old Durham North Carolina enjoyed not one but three crosses burned wednesday night. That has to be some kind of record of hatred being expressed. Does a flaming cross still pack the fearful punch it once did? That's just like a stupid fucking Klansmen to think his poppa's antagonism has aged liked fine moonshine. Maybe once Bush fulfills his dream of ridding the Middle East of arabs, all these superior human beings can move over there and begin their own new fangled c'untry. I did like hearing that burning a cross on private property in Durham without the owner's consent is a misdemeanor. Because it shouldn't be no offense if I'm burnin' me one of them crosses on me own lawn for the purposes of simply providing light, or cookin'.

I'm tired of the easily offended folks who get all bent out of shape simply because you don't want to get take-out with the rest of the office. Go eat your lunch and leave me the fuck alone.

If you find yourself in a situation where it seems like it requires you to say _______ called and they want their ________ back.........you probably shouldn't. I mean if your saying shit like that you're also most likely referring to things as the bomb, and suction cupping "Baby on Board" signs to your car window. That shit's antiquated. The snacker at KFC is not remotely explosive, and Sally Jesse Rafael doesn't even use the phone so she couldn't have even called about her glasses. If you want to be cutting edge with the slang you need to stop fearing black people. The best way to bastardize a culture is to embrace it somewhat.

Pull yourself away from the grill this weekend and come check out a comedy show. Both Friday and Saturday night I can be found at the Holly Hotel with two other rock solid performers.