Pimpin' ain't Easy
Life is butt fucking hard when you're big time recording artists like Three Doors Down. Three Dog What? If you're unfamiliar just ask the biddy who serves your beers at whatever crap bar you go to. I'll bet she loves them. My beef with the band outside of their garbage mid-tempo insincere music, stems from the fact that they've taken "sophomore hardluckism" to the next level. Sophomore hardluckism is a term I use in reference to bands who follow up a hit record with a record about how difficult life is. Now I can't pretend to understand how good life is in Escatawpa, Mississippi where the bands from, but c'mon? Every single song I have the misfortune of hearing on the radio by these dudes is so fucking whoa is me. I heard one today that they tricked Bob Seger into singing on. That's an abomination! Now that you've sold some 14 million records you're not home a lot. I get that. But what exactly were you doing before the rock n' roll thing took off? Let's do a little poll. Which of the next two options sounds more like what you'd be interested in having as a life.
1) Playing sold out rock shows in front of adoring fans who don't know any better, chicks who want to do anything and everything with you on your command, sleeping at fancy hotels with hot tubs that actually get cleaned for use with the aforementioned chicks, anything you want to eat or drink, and you're being paid. You might have strained relations with a girlfriend who's at home though.
2) Hanging out on the porch of a house overlooking a swamp, paying for your own Skoal, playing a shit bar show on the occasion you can get off work at the Subway, your high school sweetheart let's you make fart noises on her chest with your mouth once in a while, but only if you have taken her out to Waffle House first.
I'm no Nostradamus but something tells me that Three Doors Down might be all of Two years away from being Hootie and the Blow Fish, so I'd get busy enjoying myself. Perhaps I'm the idiot (more than likely and unrelated to this topic), maybe the sad songs come from a place of fabricated hurt to induce a pang in the hearts of all their soccer mom fans, thus making it all an elaborate scheme. Nice job fellas. Now work on making that NickleBack type money!!
Sklar Brothers are hosting the Jim Rome Show today. Very Nice.
1) Playing sold out rock shows in front of adoring fans who don't know any better, chicks who want to do anything and everything with you on your command, sleeping at fancy hotels with hot tubs that actually get cleaned for use with the aforementioned chicks, anything you want to eat or drink, and you're being paid. You might have strained relations with a girlfriend who's at home though.
2) Hanging out on the porch of a house overlooking a swamp, paying for your own Skoal, playing a shit bar show on the occasion you can get off work at the Subway, your high school sweetheart let's you make fart noises on her chest with your mouth once in a while, but only if you have taken her out to Waffle House first.
I'm no Nostradamus but something tells me that Three Doors Down might be all of Two years away from being Hootie and the Blow Fish, so I'd get busy enjoying myself. Perhaps I'm the idiot (more than likely and unrelated to this topic), maybe the sad songs come from a place of fabricated hurt to induce a pang in the hearts of all their soccer mom fans, thus making it all an elaborate scheme. Nice job fellas. Now work on making that NickleBack type money!!
Sklar Brothers are hosting the Jim Rome Show today. Very Nice.
posted by Vince at 12:25 PM
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