Gravy Boot

ATTENTION:
The "Live" page is wrong and I am not in Ann Arbor tonight. I will however be there at 8&10:30 Friday and Saturday. Get off your ass since this may be your last time seeing me for a while. I'll get into why in the near future.

I was at the eye clinic this morning in preparation for getting this stye sliced off my eye. As the student doctor was screening me he asked if I was married or had children related to the form he was filling out. After posing the questions he quickly made it known he wasn't "insinuating" anything he just needed to know for the form. What was he afraid I was assuming? Was he not insinuating that I was in fact gay? That I couldn't be married because I generally appeared happy, and without burden? That my eyesight would be effected how by any of this? Dude straight wanted to know my status in hopes of bro'ing down with me over some wings and beers? How could I not be attached scroll down and look at me with a moustache!
The fellow in question proved himself of use later when I voiced concern about how gruesome my eye would look after the surgery. I made it know it's already tough for me to gain credibility on stage and stitches hanging off might work against me. He was quick to dispel any worry I had by letting me know "I could just make a joke out of it." Prodigal.

I got an email advertising personal letters from Santa for Christmas. Two of the major selling points kind of threw me. They advertise that the letters will all be postmarked from the North Pole, Alaska. Is there a kid who still believes in Santa who is at a point where they are checking the postmark for authenticity? Do they know what a post mark is? Do they know it's Christmas? Is the North Pole in Alaska? Geographically no. Nationalistically yes. If the North Pole isn't in Alaska that might mean Santa is a no good foreigner who's been stealing jobs form America for ages.
They also made it clear they'd send a "traditional" letter or a "Christian" version. What's the diff? In the Christian version does Santa get all self-deprecating and explain how he's simply a pawn in the big picture and he'll never be "the reason for the season" and inform the child that if they put too much importance upon his roll in the holiday it may result in the eternal damnation of their tiny little soul?