Item ends in 7 days

Next Wednesday The Sidekick III becomes available. For anyone who has tried to hold a conversation with me in recent history you understand that this is a serious development. But how to fund this much "needed" item?

I could take a page from Jose Conseco's Book. Actually he didn't write about this in his book but during one of his stints under house arrest a few years back he held an auction on eBay where the winner could come over and hang with him at his home. I recall that the Auction description held a few examples of what you and the "Bash Brother" could do together. Examples like have a BBQ, lift weights, or go for a swim. I bet he also tried to show the winner pictures of his pre-steroids dong that were on his cell phone. So I guess I'll give the readers of this page the right of first refusal before opening the auction to the entire universe on eBay. For the amount it takes to upgrade me to Sidekick III (price tbd) you can come to Bushwick Brooklyn, dine at the Mexican Chinese restaurant (not fusion food, confusion food), go to the self proclaimed .99 cent store where the sign in the window reads "All items .99 cents and down or up" making it just a regular store. Don't worry there's still a load of junk to pour over in there. Next we'll pull some chairs out onto the balcony and hope that the people on the next street over are doing choreographed dance routines(not responsible if they aren't). At nights end you have the choice of either watching, or taking part as my roommate rummages through the fridge and cupboards like a drunken Bear who has been fed garbage and now thinks he has a right to eat human food all the time. Thanks for shopping.