This Morning has been Proper Gross

For a while now I have been getting breakfast related items from this same place. When I say hole in the wall I do not embellish. It's about a 10'x6' space with a stove, cooler, and Three employees. So this morning I arrive at the mouth of the hole to find a big yellow sign that reads "Closed by order of City Health Department". I wasn't as much mentally disturbed by the image of what may have caused this closing, as I was that I'd now have to go without a sandwich. In the case of dirty food places unless it's rubbed in my face, I always assume I've had worse without knowing it and continue eating. So you'll need to butter that bread, place whatever roaches, rat hair, and prairie dog waste that got you shut down and grab the back of my head with one hand, and press that filth toast into my beautiful face, and get to rubbing. Other wise I'm probably coming back. But what happened next can only be described as insult to injury. On my return down the street feeling ever so "Down and Out in Beverly Hills" (the Nolte film not the location, I'm still in NYC) I look down to admire how my legs always go back and forth carrying me where I want to go and require no supervision, and what do I see? I believe adults call it a maxi-pad! East 32nd and Park Ave? Really? Somebody decided it was time to cut bait? Or were they shifting on the fly and trying to start a new one, but just like a piece of Dentine, once it hits the ground you should probably just move on and let it go? Ladies, some tact please.

In other news I once again caught Murray Lundquist, "Super Agent to the Stars" crushing KFC Snackers on the corner of 14th and 2nd last night. I don't know the last time I passed those streets and didn't spotted him snackin'. It's cutting into his work. A number of his clients and I are in talks with A&E Television to try and get him some help.

Get well Placido Polanco! You are my Tiger! Nobody can replace that bat, that glove, or that cranium.