Walk my Plank

Get a load of this shit!! Amphibious car? I wouldn't even talk to you if I had one. If you have any notion that I am pompous now, you'll want to steer (no pun, no pun) clear of me once I have the ability to make a hard right onto the open sea. Behind the wheel of this bad ass piece of steel I will be found eating creme brulee, flipping off land based vehicles and their limp dick pilots, with a silk scarf wrapped around my neck. I best not have to get out and do any manual change over before I can hit the water. There better be a big awesome looking button I can press with the pinkie on my hand which still holding my dessert dish. I'm resigned to the fact that having an amphibious car will require me to live in squalor, no change there, and besides, being the only dude in town with a vehicle that recognizes no bridges is like carrying a pheromone hose that sprays with 30 pounds of pressure. You can always go back to their place, especially in your car that doesn't give a shit if some fish get ran over.