It's just

The ink is dry and I'm going to be touring Western Canada from September 13th to October 20th. I'd have to assume these writings will become more frequent and interesting as a result.

Let's see here...Oh, I'm really into the TV show John from Cincinnati. It's quite bizarre but worth going out of your way to check out, although it will require HBO. I also fully endorse the new Ryan Adams album "Easy Tiger". There's not a bad cut on that thing. I figured since I haven't written much here, I should at least share some of the things I've been doing instead. Let's not pretend this will ever become very personal.

But enough about my stupid interests, I mean what is this Speed Dating, over here!?!?

I don't understand how lead paint is still being used. I realize that it's a superior decorative coating for surfaces, but I also know it's very good at fucking up living things that come in contact with it. Mercury's really cool looking too, but we stopped using it in make-up after the dude who played the Tin Man had his face fall off. I'm calling for the immediate stoppage of all lead paint use, unless it's used in sparkly boat paint. If we need to use lead in order to make our speed boats look sweet than I say bring on the debilitating disease. Every man has his price.

I recall a lot of guys in grade school used to make motor noises with their mouths when they ran. You know, during a race in gym, fellas would get an extra boost from making a motorcycle sound. Anybody heard this going on at the gym, with adults? I guess it might weird some people out, but if I was working out (not a great chance of that happening) and some guy got loose on imagining he was a alcohol funny car, or a souped up snowmobile, I could get behind that. I defend that gentleman to the chicks leaving their Spinning class.